A Gaseous State

Billie: “Look, mom! Look at my video game! It’s a fart peeing!”
Me: “Whoa- what?”
Billie: “A FART. PEEING. This is AMAZING!”
Me: “Your game is about the periodic table of elements. That’s Radon. It’s not a fart.”
Billie: “Is Radon a gas?”
Me: “Well, yea, but–”
Billie: “And farts are gas.”
Me: “Sweetie, I—”
Billie: “And this gas is peeing, right? So LET IT RAIN FART PEE BABY!!”
Me: “That’s not how any of this works!”
Doug: “Are you seriously trying to talk sense into her after she discovered the phrase ‘fart pee?'”
Me: “It’s just that–”
Billie: “FART PEE FART PEE RAINING DOWN ON MOMMMMMY!”

My kid’s going to be a scientist.

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