“Butt Princess.”

butt princess

Advertisement
Image

Wherein Billie Makes Her Own Memes

secret agent Billie is a cat

I don’t think she gets the idea of the memes… but she had a lot of fun writing these.

And, yes, I did freak out at the “A(n) Owl” faux pas. But she’s five, ya’ll. Give her a break.

(Editor’s note: Calliope is her cousin and Jemi is her aunt… Obviously Auntie Jemi has some serious ‘splaining to do.)

Wherein Billie Makes Her Own Memes

Billie badger don’t give a shit.

I just walked in on Billie on her hands and knees with a bag of ice in her mouth, tearing her face back and forth vigorously.

“Um. Whatcha doin, love?”

Her mouth goes slack and the bag of ice drops to the floor. She looks at me disapprovingly before saying, “Don’t you remember I’m a badger? Badgers don’t talk.”

She sighed as if exhausted by my lack of intellect, picked up the bag of ice with her teeth, and went back to shaking it ferociously; growling and drooling all the while.

This is my life, guys.

Billie badger don’t give a shit.

Stray Cat Strut

Stray cats rules our backyard. Billie likes to pretend that they’re hers. The latest cat to grace her presence was surreptitiously dubbed “Locke Nemmernon Carrot Robot.”

Now she’s in the backyard with a stick singing “here kitty, here kitty, here here Locke Nemmernon! Don’t you wanna be my carrot robot?”

I’d apologize to the neighbors but it’s a strict policy of mine not to apologize for awesome.

Stray Cat Strut